I Dont Deserve This
by lovelylynn21
Summary: Bella Meets The New Guy and She instantly Hates Him. But Theres Something About Him That Makes Her Woner, And When She Learns What He Is and When He Family Comes Back, Bella Is More Than Overwhelmed By Her Past, and Some Unexpected Visitors.
1. Chapter 1

**I HOPE THAT YOU LIKE THIS, YOU VOTED ON IT, SO I WROTE IT AND HERE IS WHAT I GOT SO FAR. SORRY THAT ITS SO LONG, I JUST COULDN'T STOP WRITING. I DON'T KNOW IF THIS STORY WILL GO ANYWHERE OR IF I'LL FINISH IT, BUT PLZ ENJOY IT.**

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There was a knock on my door, that meant it was probably morning…I couldn't tell because I really hadn't gone to sleep yet. I had drawn my blinds closed and sat wrapped up in my bed like I usually do when his name comes back in my mind. But everyday it was the same my day started with a knock on my door from Charlie, and nothing else, not another word from him, just the knock.

I pulled myself out of my bed and decided to take a shower, I needed one. When I was done I put my hair up in a towel and wrapped myself in my robe. I hated getting up in the morning, and I hated sleeping too. Every time I slept I knew I would wake up alone, and it was something that I wasn't really used to yet, I was so used to those cold arms around me in the morning, that when I actually woke up warm it would sadden me. Getting up in the morning just meant that another day had passed, another day I was alone, another day without love, and another day without him.

Once I decided what to wear, which was a pair of faded blue jeans and her favorite purple long sleeved shirt, she made her way downstairs to grab a bite to eat. She wasn't shocked to find that Charlie has left already. It was like this every morning. He was gone before she came downstairs, and that didn't bother her at all, she liked it that way.

I took out a can of coke and put two pieces of bread in the toaster and sat down to wait. It was quiet in the house, and the only thing that really made any noise was the TV that Charlie had left on in the living room that was left on the news channel that was now telling us the weather for today…cold and wet…what a surprise. The other sound that I heard wasn't as overpowering and only happened every so often in the morning and it was the sound of the heater kicking on and off of its own free will.

_Pop!_

My toast was down, and I quickly pulled it out of the toaster and laid the slices onto a plate and sat back down at the table. I ate one of the pieces and about half of the other before telling myself that I wasn't hungry anymore. I stole a quick look at the clock and got up; it was time to get to school.

I picked up my backpack upon leaving the house with the keys to her truck in hand. The truck started up as smoothly as could be expected of her truck and I backed out of the driveway. It wasn't a long drive to the school, and even if it was it's not like it mattered. No one was waiting for her there, not one person who was wondering where I was. They could act like they cared, even ask me if I was okay, but it's not like they weren't whispering about me behind my back.

"Idiots…" I whispered to myself as I turned into the schools parking lot. I spotted a decent parking spot and went for it. When out of no where a white, pricy sports car skidded right in front of her and took my spot. The last time I'd seen cars like this they belonged to a family that wasn't exactly normal.

I honked my horn as hard as I could as the driver was stepping out of the vehicle; he was tall with shaggy blonde hair and reddish brown eyes. He was lean enough to be the poster boy for some ad agency, but the shape of his arms slightly hinted that he was also muscular. I began to roll down my window with every intent of yelling at the guy, and he began to make his way over to my truck with a smile that he probably thought was "hott" in the terms of all the bobble headed people around here, but I'd been around people who's looks were far more tempting than his, he wasn't going to get out of this.

"What the hell were you thinking?!" I screamed at him. "You could have killed me, or damaged Nessie!"

"Nessie?" he asked me with a quizzical look on his face.

"My car." I said flustered by his stupid questions. "Now are you going to explain what was going through your mind when you almost killed me?" I demanded.

"Well at the time I just saw a great parking spot, but if I had known that someone as pretty as you was gunning for it I would have let you have it." He said and I just rolled my eyes.

"Be more careful next time, or I'll run into you with my truck. And I can guarantee you that this truck will do more damage to your matchbox car than yours would to mine." I said then put my car in drive again.

"Actually, this is the new 2009 Lamborghini Gallardo Spyder they aren't even out yet." He said with a lopsided grin that looked a lot like _his._

"Like I said…matchbox car." I said getting slightly annoyed, he reminded me too much of my past.

"What's your name?" he said staring at me.

"I don't have one." I said pressing the gas of my car down and going to find a new spot.

I was half way through fifth period math when the door to the room opened. And there he stood.

"Mr. Hay? I'm new here, my name is Damion Luvaldi." He said.

"They told me about you….um….let's try to find you a seat." Mr. Hay said, and I sighed. I knew where he was going to be put; he was going to be put into the only empty seat in the class. And that seat is the one next to me.

"Why don't you sit next to Miss. Swan." He said and I sighed louder this time and I saw Damion's eyes drift to me when Mr. Hay pointed me out and he smiled. Math class was going to suck for me from now on.

I heard the soft thump as his books landed on the table next to mine, and I felt eyes on me. I just ignored him and paid more attention to what the teacher was saying.

"So…Miss. Swan, hm?" I heard him ask followed by his smug egotistical laugh. And I just glared that the writing on the board.

"Ah, the silent treatment? Well if it's just silent…" he trailed off and before I knew it a piece of folded paper was slid onto my desk.

_So you're ignoring me? _The piece of paper said.

I let out a little laugh and scribbled back my response, which read.

_There's a difference between ignoring and just plain not liking someone._

I handed it back to him and he returned it in under 10 seconds.

_What did I do? _He responded, I didn't even take the time to respond and I just handed the paper back to him without adding anything to it.

He seemed confused for a moment, but then he scribbled something back again.

_Really, I mean I want to be friends with you. _The paper read and I openly laughed, almost immediately all the eyes in the room landed on me and I blushed.

Quickly I wrote him back.

_Why don't you be friends with Jessica Stanley, the one next to you, she's practically hyperventilating by your presence. _

This time it was his laugh that drew the attention in the class. And he shot a look at Jessica and then back again.

_She's nothing special._ He wrote back.

_Don't tell me your one of those sick freaks that goes for the weird and depressing types._ I wrote back.

_Weird and depressing? Is that what you are?_

_Give it some time, once you hear the things in the school, you'll change your mind. Besides I'm not interested in being friends. _I saw him grimace from the corner of my eye and his hand scribble across the paper again.

_Like what things?_ He asked avoiding how I said I didn't want to be friends.

_Things that do not concern you._ I scribbled back then the bell rang and I sprang up from my seat and out the door. I didn't get from the classroom before Damion caught me by my elbow and pulled me back.

"What do you want?" I asked not looking at him.

"I want…I want to know you." He whispered leaning in closer to me so I could hear. I shrugged off his hold on my elbow and glared at him.

"I don't want to know you, things are fine for me right now, and I'm not going back to the place I was before. So just leave me be." I hissed spinning around on my heal and storming away.

"What if I can't?!" I heard him yell after me, but I chose to ignore it. I was going to lunch next, well I was supposed to, but instead I was going to hang out behind the school with the people that I didn't even consider friends before, but you can't really judge them until you know them.

"Hey Bella! You're late today, you know what that means!" my friend Chloe giggled looping her arm through mine.

"No, no, no, no, no!" I said. "I haven't even had lunch, please not on an empty stomach! I'm begging you!"

"Nope!" Justin said thrusting the bottle of beer into my hands. It was only half full, I think he did that on purpose.

"You know the rules, if you're late you have to take a bottle. Now, go!" Chloe shouted, almost falling over laughing."

"Fine, fine!" I said, raising the bottle to my lips.

"You owe me later, you know that Bella!" Justin said grinning ear to ear and I just nodded, and began to down the beer. If felt like forever but it was finally gone, well I guess it was only half a bottle.

"There." I said handing Chloe the empty bottle. I felt two arms snack around me, and I instantly knew who it was.

"Leon," I sighed. "I thought you were going to stop with the sexual harassment."

"How am I going to stop when you look so fine?" He breathed in my ear.

"So this is where you've been Miss. Swan." I heard someone say and I quickly turned around and saw Damion.

"What are you doing here?" I said venom in my voice.

"Whoa! Don't be so hostile." He said staring at Leon's arms around my waist and I smirked.

"Is there something that you need Damion?" I asked looking him in the eye.

"Actually no there is nothing that I need right now. My friend Justin here invited me to hang out back here, fancy meeting you here though." He smiled with a twinkle in his eye.

"You're not meeting me here." I said flat out.

"See you later Chloe, Leon…" I said squeezing my way out if Leon's arms and walking up to Justin. I hugged him and placed a quick kiss on his cheek. "See you later Justin." Then I leaned in closer and whispered in his ear. "That kiss is what I owed you for the beer, thanks for that by the way." I said.

"Anytime Bells, I would do anything for you." Justin said and gave me a little wink, and I rolled my eyes.

I could see Damion just out of the corner of my eyes, and he seemed to be just watching…what a weirdo.

I began walked away when I heard Damion asking Justin something.

"So are you and Bella an item?" he asked Justin.

_Please Justin, just tell him yes so he can leave me alone…_

"Yeah, me and her have been together for a while." I breathed a sigh of relief, and opened the back door to the school.

Even if Justin and me weren't really together this excuse would help to keep that Damion creep away from me. I decided to call my lunch over and head for my study hall in the library. I didn't have much else to do anyway.

I found an empty table and sat down resting my head on my arms.

"Why did you run away?" I heard someone ask me. I didn't look up, by now I knew that voice, and I wish I never had to hear it before.

I chose to ignore him and closed my eyes.

"Did I do something to you to deserve this kind of treatment?" he asked sounded a little hurt.

I realized that he really hadn't done anything to me apart from taking my parking spot this morning and many people have don't that to me before I was really used to it. The only thing about him that made me wary was how similar he was to _them._

I sighed and turned my head sideways to look at him. "You didn't do anything. There are you happy? So just leave me be." I said.

He ignored my request and sat down in the chair opposite me.

"See I may be a little odd, but I'm taking this very personally." He said.

"Well it's not, so you can clear that off your conscience and just leave." I hissed.

"What then? It if it's not about something that I've done to you, what about me is so bad? "

I looked at him for a moment before answering him.

"I don't like your type." I said

"My type?"

"Yeah, your type." I said.

"I'm not like most guys." He said smirking and reaching out to touch my face….his hand was cold….too cold. I looked up at him in shock…why hadn't I known this before? He's so pale and good looking, and cold…Damn!

"Leave me alone." I said more firmly.

"I will after you tell me what my type is exactly, the reason you can't be my friend."

"You cold, pale and good looking. I tend to lean more towards guys that are alive, in a sense."

His eyes lit up as he took in what I said.

"I am alive, can't you tell, here I am moving and speaking." He laughed.

"What did you have for dinner last night? Was it red?" I asked with a knowing smile.

"You seem well informed." Was all he said to my question, and I knew in that moment how closely he was linked to my past.

"Leave, now. Get out of my town, and out of my life." I hissed and took a closer look at his eyes…the first time I had seen them, I had noticed that they were reddish brown.

"You sicken me…you really do. Trying to cover up the red in your eyes with contacts like what you do isn't sick and twisted." I shook my head in disgust.

He gave ma a little half smile.

"What else am I supposed to eat?" he asked.

"I know what you are, but there are other ways to get what you eat rather than killing people."

"Oh?" Was all he said raising his eyebrows.

"Yeah, other families of your kind hunt in better ways than you."

"And you knew them?" He asked the shock on his face not even hidden now.

"Yes, I did know them, I knew them better than I wanted to." I said running my fingers over the small half moon scar on my wrist. He saw the movement of my hand over my scar and smiled.

"You were bit, eh? One of your _friends_ get a little to friendly for you liking?"

I glared at him. "Don't talk about things you know nothing of. They were all kind people and I loved them like family, and they loved me like their daughter and sister. I loved them all…so much." I said looking down at my little scar. "Then he…they left me…" A small tear fall on my wrist and I brushed it away.

"Broken heart, huh?"

"You're about to have a broken jaw." I said.

"Think you could break it?" He asked teasing clear in his voice.

"Oh, give me a crowbar and a lighter and you'd be down for the count."

"I can see and smell why they liked you so much."

I rolled my eyes and looked away. "As much as I've enjoyed this chat I have to be going." I said turning away from him.

"W-wait!" He called after me and caught my elbow.

I looked at him tiredly. "What? What could you possibly want from me Damion?" I asked tiredly.

"I…I…" He let my wrist go and I looked at him for a moment longer.

"Don't worry, you may be wondering why I seem so different and intriguing to you right now, but give it some time. You'll realize it's just how I smell that keeps you around then you'll leave. Like all of them do. I'm not concerned." I said looking down at his hands as they clenched into fists.

"It's his fault." He hissed.

"Hm? What are you talking about?" I asked looked at him slightly taken aback.

"It's that vampire's fault that you're like this. I bet you weren't like this before." He said looking me up and down.

"Ha! Like you would know what I was like before." I said laughing.

"Don't…don't act like what he did didn't hurt you." He said looking at me with soft eyes.

"It doesn't hurt me." I said matter-of-factly. "I knew that he was too good for me from the beginning. He's everything that I'm not I never deserved him. We live in completely different worlds and that's just life." I said with a sigh.

All of a sudden I was in a cold embrace with stone hard arms wrapped around me. "Never say that…never say that you don't deserve something." He whispered.

"But I don't, and I know that." I patted him on the back. "Look, if we're going to make this easier on you, you might just want to steer clear of me. I mean I haven't smelt my own blood but apparently it's a big deal. So if you just stay-"

"I refuse." He said simply.

"W-…What?" I asked shocked.

"I refuse to stay away from you." He said smiling as his brownish eyes lit up and his dimples came out.

"Okie, the cute guy act is okay for right now, but really…be yourself." I said.

His face darkened and his body became rigid and tense, and all of a sudden I was scared.

"D-Damion? What's wrong?" I asked.

"Bella…go…" He hissed quietly pushing me away.

"What? Why?" I demanded not moving.

"There are five vampire's here." He said just as I was able to hear and see them. In an instant my heart dropped into my stomach and tears started to fall.

"Why?" I said through the tears.

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ohhhhhhhhh cliffhanger, yeah i know i do that ALOT!!!!!!!

**GET USED TO IT! ha~!**

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	2. Chapter 2

**Ahhh, I hope you like this a lot I spent a lot of time on this one trying to make it better…here you go!!!!!!**

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I stood with tears running down my face as I looked at the five vampires that were the cause of my current state of being. Damion was getting madder by the second at my blatant disregard to listen to him and move.

"D-Damion…it's okie…I…um…"

"She knows us." Alice said bounding up to me and giving me a long hug.

"Hi Alice." I said weakly.

Damion stood at my side, then the realization lit up in his face and be began looking at them each.

Edward looked right at Damion with a hate that I'd never seen before on his face when he saw Damion's hand circling my wrist.

"You're the one." Damion said simply at Edward and managed to put so much hate into his tone that goosebumps rose on my arms.

"Bella…" Edward said his voice sounding ancient and dead.

"Edward." I said and my voice cracked and I hit myself silently for letting him see me so weak. "You look good." I told him, that was such a lie. He looked just as bad as I did.

He let out a humorless laugh and smiled slightly.

"BELLA!!!!" I winced at the loud voice as I was swept up into a pair of bear arms.

"Emmett." I said wincing unable to breath. He laughed again and put me down.

"I've missed you so much sis." He said happily.

"I missed you too Emmett." I said.

"Bella, it's nice to see you again." Jasper said with a smile.

"You too Jasper." I said smiling.

"Bella." Rosalie said simply.

"Rosalie." I said back.

We all stood there for a minute before Alice broke the silence.

"So who is this Bella?" She asked looking at Damion.

"He's-"

"I'm Damion, her boyfriend." He said simply and I let out laugh, a real one. He looked at me with a smile. Edward on the other hand looked pissed.

"This is Damion, the liar." I said smiling at his attempt to stir up problems.

"Nice to meet you Damion!" Alice said shaking his hand. "I hope you've been taking care of our Bella." She said smiling.

"Your Bella?" Damion asked incredulously.

"Mhm!" She said and wrapping her arms around my shoulders and smiling and I just rolled my eyes.

"Well, I find it interesting that you all decided to come back to visit your snack after just leaving her." He said and I turned to glare at him, he was saying too much.

I looked over at Edward and he was clenching his hands, and I could tell he was close to going off.

"Um, Damion, can you give us time? I'll see you in class okay?" I said with a smile, I wasn't sure how Damion had become my best friend all of a sudden but it was nice to have him there when they just showed up, I probably would have has a heart attack on my own.

"Sure, talk to you later, babe." He said with a wink and walked away.

I laughed again and then turned back to face my vampire family, them all staring at me wide eyed and confused.

"I just met him today if you can believe it." I said as honestly as I could while looking at them warily. We all just kind of stood there in silence before I finally got up the nerve to talk.

"So…why did you guys come back?" I asked. It was the one thing that I wanted an answer to above all else. Edward left me, and he didn't love me anymore. I was just a toy to him, and I was a nice little show for their entire family, so why would they even care to come back?

"Bella, we all owe you an apology." Alice said stepping forward. "We all left because Edward said you guys had broken up and that it would be rough for you to see us around school. He never told us that he broke up with you because he was worried about your safety."

"He broke up with me because he doesn't love me anymore..." I said my voice rising. "…Look it's nice to see you guys again I admit, kind of confirms that I wasn't going crazy, but I have to get back to class and Damion will probably come back out here to kill you if I take much longer talking to you. Besides I have class." I said standing there awkwardly.

"Bella, please just listen to me." Edward said his voice on the edge of hysteria.

"No, Edward I'm through listening to you and your lies. You left me, and I won't lie, I was miserable, but I will admit that it made sense for you to leave me. It's not like I'm something special, just a regular human." I looked him in the eye and saw all the sadness that he wasn't letting out, the rage that he was keeping inside and a minor hint of

jealousy. I saw everything now that he was in the current state he was in; when we were together he was always so composed and secretive with his emotions, looks like he really did only hide his emotions from me.

"Like I said, it was nice to see you again, but I have to get back to class, I can't be late again." I turned and tried to run to the door, but that's just the thing about vampires…they're just a little bit faster than me.

Edward caught me by the arms by the time I reached the door and flipped me around pinning me to it.

"Edward, listen just-"

He cut me off by pressing his lips against mine with urgency that he never kissed me with before. His hand twined in my hair and he pressed himself to me closer than we ever had been, almost like he didn't mind crushing me.

I struggled as his arms pulled around me for a breath of air, but found none. Finally and not a moment before I was about to suffocate he pulled away, his breath ragged and his eyes intense.

And suddenly I was mad. My hand shot up and I applied as much force as I could muster and delivered and smack across his face. I knew it wouldn't hurt him physically, and I really didn't hurt me much, but I knew that he'd get the idea.

We just stood there staring at each other breathing, but both of us were breathing for different reasons, he was breathing because he was trying hard to control himself, whereas I was breathing because he had almost suffocated me.

"Bel-"

"Save it." I interrupted in my voice trembling. "Just save it and put it with every other lie that you've ever told me, and leave." I muttered and I turned around and swung open the door to the school, and pulled it closed again behind me. It was better this way. This big grey door that I couldn't see through…it was fitting that it should be here between us, and keeping us apart.

I turned around and pressed my back against the door, closing my eyes.

"Bella…" I looked up and saw Damion standing in the same entranceway as me leaning against the wall as if he'd been there the entire time.

"D…Damion…" I whispered as a tear ran and fell from my eye. He came to me and wrapped his arms around me and just let me cry…and I did.

"Bella…I'm so sorry." He whispered into my hair hugging me tighter.

"I…I don't know why they came back." I said my voice cracking as tears ran down my face and onto his shoulder. "I don't understand anything anymore. He left me Damion, he left me and told me he didn't love me so why…why would he kiss me?" I said more so just to talk and calm myself down, I wasn't expecting him to answer.

"He kissed you?" He asked whispering in my ear, I didn't answer. "Bella…I shouldn't have left you there with them, I should have waited somewhere they wouldn't see me…I should have-"

"No…it's not your fault." I said wiping my eyes and separating myself from him. "It's no ones fault but mine, I shouldn't have talked to him…" I smiled and thanked him again and tried to walk away but he pulled me back.

"Why…why don't you just stay with me for a while. Incase he comes back! I mean not cause I want you to…well I mean I do…it's just-"

"Damion…it's okay, Edward is a nice man and he will not try anything weird on me." I said smiling and reassuring him.

"_Edward, _is the one that sent you in here crying because he kissed you. Isn't that right? What else wouldn't he do to you just to get something he wanted?" Damion asked his voice rising, he was getting angry.

"How dare you! You don't know anything!" I yelled. "He's one of the nicest men that I've ever met in my entire life!" by this time I was full on yelling.

"Fine, do whatever the hell you want then!" he yelled then was quiet for a second before he sat down against the wall. "Dammit, Bella." He breathed resting his forehead on his knees and holding the back of his neck with his hands.

"I'm going back to class…thank you for what you were trying to do for me Damion…really. I still think that it's best that we stay apart as much as possible during school. It's not good for you or others of your kind." I whispered and he started shaking his head back and forth like he was going to start to say something but I interrupted him.

"Look, its not that I don't like you, because I do, you're a nice person and I think in another life we could have been friends, but I've been through too much, and I've seen too much of a world that I was never meant to find. I can't be a part of that world anymore, it's not mine." I laughed. "But I guess where I live kinda draws your type in, huh? Nice and cloudy, not much sun…maybe I'll move back to Phoenix with my mom…all sun." I realized I was thinking out loud now and I shook my head to clear it.

"You can't leave." Damion said simply his red-brown eyes filling more and more with anguish.

"Look, Damion this doesn't have to be as hard as you're making it to be right now. We'll just simply stay away from each other until I can make plans with my mom to go back to Phoenix, then you can have the whole place to-"

"YOU'RE NOT LEAVING!" he screamed over me, and I stood staring at him with wide eyes. When I had finally managed to recover I took a deep breath.

"That's not up to you." I said and turned finally and proceeded back to class.

I got to class late as I knew I would and just took my seat in the back. All the other seats had been taken except for a few in the back row so that looked pretty good to me. My teacher gave me a slight nod and pointed to the tardy sheet then back to my seat as she taught.

The door to the classroom opened again as I took my seat and Damion walked in, and I couldn't repress my urge to sigh.

"I'm sorry Mrs. Grander Miss. Swan was showing me around the school up till now, I'd appreciate it if you didn't mark her as tardy, it was really all my fault." He said looking at her and handing her his new student form he was urged to use every period if he was late.

"Of course." Mr. Grander said as she scribbled out my name on the tardy sheet. "Just take a seat in the back." She said with a smile at him, and I rolled my eyes. Why was everyone attracted to vampires?

I was expecting him to sit next to me, maybe part of me wanted him to but I still found it weird when he did.

"You didn't have to do that." I said not looking at him.

"It was the least I could do." He breathed in a hushed voice, and I could still hear the remnants of pain that lingered in his tone.

"Look, Damion. You don't know me, so don't pretend to. You don't need to act like your upset that I'm leaving, and I don't need your sympathy." I sighed. "Truth is, now that they know where I am I think it would be better for me to leave before I fall for him again. It's not healthy for anyone like me to get snared into that world."

He wasn't looking at me, but I knew he had caught every word I said. He was calculating in his mind in the same way that Edward always used to. Trying to think of a way out of something I had just said.

"What would make you stay?" he said finally.

"We're in class." I said as I listened to my art teacher lecturing about a dead Italian painter.

He growled, but still let the topic drop.

The bell for the class rung and we were set free for lunch. I wasn't expecting what I found there.

But everyone was talking and I couldn't deny what I saw.

Jessica came bounding up to my and looped her arm through mine. "So, your man came back to town I see, all the Cullen's did. Great, huh?" she said with a bright smile and I felt myself being ripped into two.

From across the room I saw Jasper visibly cringe, and his eyes shot to me. Everyone else followed his eyes to the reason he cringed and found me.

I knew where I should go and sit, but I didn't want to go and sit with my regular table and hear them talk all about the Cullen's, and I really couldn't sit with the Cullen's like I used to mean…I was so stuck.

I stood there with my feet rooted to the ground where I stood with my eyes on them, and no where else to go. Edward stood up, and almost in the exact moment someone looped their arm through mine.

"Come on." He said, and I saw Edwards face flare up in anger.

"D-Damion!" I breathed as he pulled me to a table that was empty and just the two of us sat there. We were both quiet until I spoke. "Thanks." I said.

He just nodded and got in line for lunch. Which was odd to me, but I guess he has to keep up the charade too. I just sat there with my bottle of water, and with my head down. He was back quickly and he slid the tray of food in front of me.

"Eat." He said simply so I picked up an apple and took a bite.

I let my eyes drift back to their table again only to see not just Edward but all of them mad. I guess they thought Damion was treating badly, Ha! That's nothing compared to what they did to me and they knew it.

"Bella!" Alice's happy voice chirped from in front of my and I almost choked on a little piece of apple.

"Alice…" I said my throat hoarse from coughing.

"Bella, why don't you come sit with us! Just like old times, Edward promises to behave." She said giving me a sly wink.

"Thank you Alice, but I don't think so." I said with a small apologetic grimace. "I really do miss you Alice, but I can't be pulled back into his life like that, he can't just come back into mine. It's time for me to be serious, that life isn't mine." I said being honest with how I felt for once, Jasper probably had something to do with that, because I definitely didn't spill all of that out of my own will.

"But, Bella-"

"Alice? Was it?" Damion broke in. "It seems as though you're distressing Bella can't you leave her in peace?" he asked with a smile somehow making the polite words seem threatening past his smile and happy tone of voice.

Alice regarded him with careful eyes again then sighed and stood up straight. "Think about it Bella, please, for me if not for him." She said then she went back to her seat. I saw her lips moving fast than a normal persons and I knew she was relaying everything we had just said to her to them word for word.

Then Edward looked over at us seething and I knew he had caught everything through her mind, and he caught the unedited version. He got up again and came over to the table, alone this time.

He stood instead of sitting down, looking down at us with a million unreadable expressions on his face, the most prominent being outrage.

"May I please speak with you Bella?" he asked his fists clenching.

I looked down at my tray of food and fiddled with my bottle of water. "I…I don't think that's…that that would be the best idea." I said tears forming in my eyes.

"Bella, please." He begged in a voice that only brought more tears to my eyes.

"I can't Edward." I said finally looking up to meet his eyes.

"Please." He said again. "Just for a moment, just…humor me?" he said with his small adorable lopsided small. I stared at his face, and that little smile pulled back so many memories for me. It reminded me of a time when I thought that he really loved me. But he didn't.

I quickly looked away from his smile and shook my head briefly, just once, I knew he would catch it though.

"Bella…" he said in a pained voice. "You must know I never meant to hurt you."

"Well you did." I said emotionlessly not looking at him, and I never looked until I felt his presence from the table was gone.

"Are you okay?" Damion asked putting his arm around me and hugging me to him.

"I'm…I'll be fine." I said removing his arm and scooting away. I didn't want him to be so close to me when I would soon be leaving.

"I care about you Bella. I really do. So please, think about staying." He said looking at me. And I just nodded, I'd give him a little piece of comfort for today I suppose, and I'll just stay home tomorrow and pack my stuff and the next day I'll be gone…I'll make him happy just for today.

"I'll really think about it Damion. Thank you for being there for me." I smiled at him and squeezed his cold hand in mine, and he smiled a little.

"That's all I ask for." He said and let me continue to eat my lunch.

Today would be my last day of school.

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**REIVEW REVIEW …….THAT WASN'T TRUE!**

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	3. Chapter 3

**Sorry it took me so long to update this, if you're reading any of my other stories im sooo sorry about the long waits, but i have been dealing with some stuff and i'll try to update more, and if you read my other stories please give this story a shot too....**

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"Bella, are you sure that you want to leave now? You haeven't really even been here that long and your mom and Phil are still moving around a lot. Wouldn't it be smarter to just tough it out here for another year until college?" Charlie asked me as we sat in our living while I told him about my plans.

"Smart-maybe, but its just too depressing here, I think I'm addicted to sun or something, I just need out of here." I said simply standing up and walking into the kitchen to start making Charlie and myself dinner.

"Are you sure that this is what you really want Bells?" he asked, and I knew I had won.

"Yeah, dad, it is." I said taking out a box of hamburger helper and turning on the stove.

"When are you leaving?" He asked taking a deep breath.

"The day after tomorrow." I said simply, keeping to my plan.

"Alright, well I take it your staying home tomorrow to pack then." He said.

"You would assume correctly." I said with a smile and putting the pan on the burner, and dumping the already thawed hamburger in it.

"Alright." He said walking back into the living room. That's what I love most about Charlie, he doesn't hover.

After the meat was basically cooked it dumped in the rest of the ingredients and let it all cook together. When it was done I set the pan to simmer and set the table quick then poured some hamburger helper onto both our plates and got out the bread, for some reason Charlie loved eating everything with a piece of bread.

After dinner was gone and I had cleaned up I headed up to my room and changed into a pair of comfy flannel pants and a tank top and collapsed onto my bed.

"Just one more day." I whispered to myself. "One more day and it's over." I closed my eyes and got lost in thought until I felt another presence in my room and looked up to see Edward.

"Edw-"

"Tell me it's not true." He said cutting me off before I could even finish his name.

"Tell you what's not true?" I asked looking at him confused.

He clenches his fists and pressed them to his temples. "You know what I'm talking about Bella, that you're leaving, is it true?" He asked looking me in the eye as I sat up on the edge of my bed.

"Yes, it's true." I answered simply.

"Do you hate me that much?" he asked his voice coated with so much agony and sorrow it made me want to cry.

I didn't answer and just stared out my window.

"Bella, answer me!" Edward said taking me by the shoulders and giving me a soft shake.

"Edward….I'm…." I looked out the window and almost gasped in shock. Damion was in my tree staring to my room with a pissed off look on his face.

"You're what…Bella?" Edward said slowly.

"I'm…" I kept staring at Damion in my window.

"Bella, don't leave, you know we belong together, please don't do this to me." He said getting down on his knees in front of my and kissing my hands.

"But, I…Edward I can't! I'm leaving the day after tomorrow and that's it! As far as I'm concerned you've done this to yourself. There's nothing you can do about it." Edwards grip tightened slightly on my shoulders and I winced in pain, and out of no where Edward's hand released me.

A low growl ripped throughout my room, and I looked up to see Damion and Edward chest to chest barring their teeth at one another.

"Guys! Stop it!" I said jumping up and trying to squeeze between them.

"Why is he here?" They both snarled at the same time.

"What do you mean? Who are you to ask about my being here, you have no idea about me and Bella, so just leave." Edward snarled.

"Likewise, and you should just go, me and Bella have something that we need to discuss apparently." Damion hissed looking at me to my opened empty suitcase and back.

I ducked my head and clenched my fists.

"……….leave." I hissed. "both of you get out now."

"Bella, you promised me! You looked me in the eye today and promised me! How could you do this?" Damion demanded looking me in the eye.

"I…I…I'm not in the mood to talk about it. Both of you leave." I said turning my back on both of them and climbing into my bed and under the covers.

"I guess this is good-bye." I breathed silently, but loud enough for them to hear. "Be well." I said seriously and heard nothing more than a small shuffling as they left the room, and left me to my pain. I curled up into a ball and closed my eyes, I don't know how many fast or slow time went by, but before I knew it light was streaming in through my window, and I had to start packing.

Charlie had really surprised me at how well he was taking this, though he didn't stay behind with me today he must have went out after I fell asleep because there were boxes piled everywhere in the living room to the kitchen. He had got them for me so that I could pack. I had already packed up my fifth box when there was a knock on the door.

I didn't really want to answer it, because I knew who it would be, well not really who, but what. It was a bright sunny day out so it figures their kind would have nothing better to do than bother me.

I grunted as I got up and walked to the door, and to my surprise it wasn't the family I thought it would be, it was Damion.

"Damion, what are you-"

"What? Your packing already?" He cut me off and looking behind me in the house.

"Well if I pack it all up today I'll be able to send it in time for my flight tomorrow morning so that its at my moms place before I get there." I said quietly.

"So you're really leaving?" He asked desperately.

I just nodded and walked back into the house.

"Bella, please, think about me…" He begged.

"Think about you?! You?!" I yelled turning around to face him. "What about me? My life is limited and my days are numbered! You don't think that I don't' want to stay here with my dad and friends? You think I want to leave and run away from the people I love? Well your wrong! I Don't!" I yelled.

"Then why are you leaving?!" He shouted back.

"Because of you!" I yelled and he stared at me wordlessly. "Because of what you are and what you remind me off, and because Edward and his family came back, and because that's a world that I can't wish to be a part of any longer. I'm human Damion, and I'm going to die, each day I get closer to death and let's just be honest with ourselves here. You're a great friend Damion, and you've done more for me than most have tried to, but the game is over and it's time to be real." I said staring at him.

"I don't want to lose you. I'm a selfish person Bella, I don't think I'll be able to let you go." He said in a hushed voice.

"You have to. You have to let me live my life." I whispered as my eyes welled up with tears.

"Don't go…go anywhere but back home, go someplace I can go with you. I don't want to have to let you go." He said taking a step into the house and closing the door.

"Damion leave…" I said turning back to the boxes. I almost yelled in surprise when his arms wrapped around my waist and he hugged me to him. "Damion…you have to let me go."

"I can't…I won't." He said holding me to him tighter.

"You're world isn't mine." I whispered, and he hugged me to him with more force and I was unable to breath any longer.

"Dami…!" I gasped but I didn't think he heard me because he pulled me in tighter and I felt something in my chest snap, and I cried out in pain, and in an instant the pressure was off my chest.

"Bella?!?!" Damion yelled as I sunk to the floor. The pain was already dulling in my chest and a warm feeling swelled up in me.

"What have you done?!!?" An enraged and surprised voice wailed as I was scooped up into someones arms.

"It…It was an accident I didn't realize…oh god…" I heard Damion muttering.

"He snapped a few of her ribs and one of them has punctured her heart…she's not going to make it." Someone said, and I knew it was Carlisle.

"No! Edward, don't! It won't solve anything." Alice yelled as the darkness engulfed me.

"We need to make a choice and we have to do it soon because we're losing her." Carlisle said.

"…..Alright Carlisle…do it." Edward whispered.

_No, no, no, no! Just let me die!_ I screamed in my head, but the pain engulfed my entire body before I could utter a word and I fell into a sleep.

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**Thanks for reading....**

**Review Review or i'll be blue...  
Review Review or i'll be blue...**


	4. My Other Stories

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**Hey Everyone!**

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**_Sorry about the wait._**

For all of you that read my 5 stories…:

**Music of the Heart**

**Falling Down and Getting Up**

**The Bella I Am Now**

**I Don't Deserve This**

~ and ~

**The New Guy Is a Vampire**

I really don't have an excuse for all the lateness and no updates besides the fact that I'm just lazy and I've had writers block horribly.

BUT!

There is a horizon~ I intend to start writing again. And if I don't start writing to the story you are reading right now then read my other stories I promise you they are all as good as I could hope and you'll like them.

**I'm also starting a new story I haven't worked everything out but you can bet you'll see it soon.**

**Thank you, for being patient.**

Love!

**Lynn**


	5. Chapter 4

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RECAP ~

_"Bella?!?!" Damion yelled as I sunk to the floor. The pain was already dulling in my chest and a warm feeling swelled up in me._

_"What have you done?!!?" An enraged and surprised voice wailed as I was scooped up into someones arms._

_"It…It was an accident I didn't realize…oh god…" I heard Damion muttering._

_"He snapped a few of her ribs and one of them has punctured her heart…she's not going to make it." Someone said, and I knew it was Carlisle._

_"No! Edward, don't! It won't solve anything." Alice yelled as the darkness engulfed me._

_"We need to make a choice and we have to do it soon because we're losing her." Carlisle said._

_"…..Alright Carlisle…do it." Edward whispered._

_No, no, no, no! Just let me die! I screamed in my head, but the pain engulfed my entire body before I could utter a word and I fell into a sleep._

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Edward POV ~

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I watched as Carlisle picked Bella up off her living room floor and carried her back to our house as fast as lightning. Without a second to spare I turned to Alice and Jasper.

"You know what do to. Make it look like a murder. We don't need any lose ends." I muttered to them, my eyes passing over Damion with a snarl.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean for-"

"Save it." I cut Damion off. "You killed her, you know that right?" I hissed and took off after Carlisle and Bella.

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Damion POV ~

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As Edward rushed out of Bella's house I followed him. I had just as much right to be there with Bella as anyone else did. I could tell he sensed me following him, because he growled again and picked up his pace. I was easily able to keep up.

I hated that I had to follow him and his family to be by Bella's side but I didn't want to be parted from her. I could feel that I needed to be near her. Ever since I first met her I knew I didn't want to part from her.

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Bella POV ~

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The fire touched every fiber of my being. It hurt everywhere. I couldn't hear anything but the sound of fire. The crackling of bones and my own screams of agony. Then for the first time in…I don't even know how long, I felt the tiniest bit of pressure on my hand. Something that wasn't caused by the pain. Something outside my own self. Then it dawned on me that someone was holding my hand. Someone was helping me through this.

_Thank you. _I thought to myself as I screamed out again.

How long had past? Seconds? Minutes? Hours? Days? I couldn't tell anymore. And the hand that was holding mine never let go, not once. Then the pain started to dim and fade away.

"I think she's coming to." I heard someone yell and the grip on my hand tightened.

"Bella?! Bella, come on wake up." I heard someone yell, and the hold on my hand tightened more. I tried hard as I could and a little sliver of light made it through my eyelids.

"Giver her 10 seconds and she'll be able to see." I heard a light voice chime.

I counted out in my head.

_1_

_2_

"Hang in there Bella."

_3_

_4_

_5_

_6_

"She's almost waking up." I heard someone boom as a twitched my fingers.

_7_

_8_

_9_

_10_

By the time I had reached the number 10 in my head I willed myself to open my eyes and the light hit me with a force stronger than anything I had ever experienced before.

"Ah!" I gasped in surprise as the room took shape before my eyes. Eight figures came into view before me. Eight people, and I felt suddenly crowed and scooted a little bit away from them.

"Is she going to be okay?" I heard one of them asked It appeared to have come from the tall blonde one, she was really pretty.

"Jasper how is she feeling?" Another person asked, an older blonde male, he seemed to be in charge.

"She's…uncertain to say the least. Scared. Confused….Carlisle you don't think…" He said anxiously his eyes darting over to a short pixie like girl with short black hair.

"We won't know for a while, son." He said his eyes trained on me still.

"Bella." Someone breathed and I looked over where the voice had come from and saw a man sitting beside me, his hand firmly gripped onto mine.

"It was you." I whispered looking at the man with the shaggy blonde hair and redish-brown eyes. "You were the one holding onto my hand this whole time." I asked him.

"Y-yeah, Bella. It was me." He said

"I see." I said a small smile playing across my face. "Thank you, you have no idea how much you helped me." I said gratefully.

"I have a question." He said looking at me thoughtfully, and then to the others and back at me. "Why are you talking to me like you don't know who I am?" He asked slowly.

I thought about it a moment…this was odd.

"Because…I don't know you?" I said unsure. "I'm sorry if I should, I really am. The truth is, I'm not sure who any of you are, and why I'm here." I said sitting up, his hand tightened around mine.

"Is that true?" he asked almost as if he was breathless, and I nodded. All of a sudden he pulled me into a hug and held me close. "I'm so sorry Bella. I'm so sorry." He whispered into my hair, and I heard a few growls escape the room.

"Whatever is going on, I'm sure it's not your fault." I said with a smile. "Also why do you keep calling me Bella? Is that my name?" I asked unsure.

"Yes-"

"Actually, your full name is Isabella Marie Swan." Someone interjected and I looked up to see a bronze haired man staring at me intently.

"Isabella Marie, huh?" I said to myself. "Well, I think I prefer Isabella." I said as a few of the people stormed from the room.

_What is going on here?_

_"_Isabella it is then." The blonde man holding my hand said and i smiled back at him, and looked around to see who had fled the room. The bronze haired man, the pixie girl, and the blonde who i guess was named Jasper had all stormed out.

"What can i call you?" i asked the man holding my hand.

"You can call me Damion." he said with a smile.

"Damion." i repeated and smiled back.

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_**I hope you liked the update. **

**It's kinda short. **

**Tell me what you think.**

**idk whats going to happen next**

**Any suggestions?**

**REVIEW**


	6. Chapter 5

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RECAP – Previous Chapter

"_Isabella Marie, huh?" I said to myself. "Well, I think I prefer Isabella." I said as a few of the people stormed from the room. _

_What is going on here?_

_"__Isabella it is then." The blonde man holding my hand said and i smiled back at him, and looked around to see who had fled the room. The bronze haired man, the pixie girl, and the blonde who i guess was named Jasper had all stormed out. _

_"What can i call you?" i asked the man holding my hand. _

_"You can call me Damion." he said with a smile._

_"Damion." i repeated and smiled back. _

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**DPOV - (Damion Point of View**

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Bella sat at my side on the couch, which is where she has been since she woke up. By my side. I looked down at her as her face turned up at mine and we exchanged a smile. I know that what I have done is unforgivable, but it beats having no Bella at my side at all. Her personality wasn't exactly the same but it's still her. The Cullen's are not exactly welcoming to me here, in fact they make it perfectly clear that I'm not welcome here. Though they seem to realize that Bella is quite attached to me, and would not stand for me being gone.

Rosalie, the blonde, seems very passive about the whole situation with Bella, though I had learned through observations that her relationship with Bella was never strong or much of anything at all. Her mate, whose name I believe is Emmett, is very cold towards me, and mourns as if Bella is dead, and feels as though he's lost a sister.

Jasper, the blonde male…he's not seen around much to my knowledge, though I've also learned that he can feel everyone's emotions around him, so this house is probably hell for him right now, especially when his mate is the causing him a lot of his pain. She's the worst of all of them. She hasn't left her room since that day, and she never talks to Bella, it's like she can't stand to be near her.

I felt a slight movement and I smiled as I noticed that Bella had laid her head on my shoulder. For being as dead as I was, being with Bella made me feel warm. Many times since her changing we are able to just sit here and say nothing, absolutely nothing, it's comforting.

Esme walked through the room and offered us both a small smile as she passes through which we returned. She has been the most…accepting of me here, though I know she's very indifferent to my presence. Her and her husband, Carlisle, they are very accepting people. They make no effort to go out of their way for me, though I never hear them speak ill of me, it's also very comforting.

Edward was another story. He was hell bent on making sure that Bella remembered him, and every second that he was able to pry her from my side he had her reliving moments from when she was human and they were together, and he would tell her stories, none of which would jog a memory, or any of which she would believe.

"Say, Damion, you said that I lost my memories of my human life, what was I like then?" she asked curiously looking up at me again. I looked down at her a little shocked, not once had she asked about her human life, and voluntarily wanted information about it, not with Edward spoon feeding it down her throat since her change.

I had only known Bella for a few days in her human life, and in all honestly, in my heart I knew that the Bella that I had met at that time wasn't the real and true Bella.

"Ah…what you used to be like…" I said slowly and as I was about to speak another person walked in. Edward.

"I don't really think your fit to answer that question, Damion." Edward half growled as he sat himself on a chair opposite us. Bella possessively wrapped her hands around my arm.

"Why isn't he?" She asked boldly.

"Well, in actuality, in your human life, he only knew you for a part of it, say…less than a week." Edward replied calmly. Bella looked a little taken aback then looked up at me.

"Is that true?" she asked then without waiting for a reply looked back at Edward. "How do you know that?" she asked.

"Because, Bella-" he was cut off.

"Isabella." She corrected.

"Isabella, I knew you for almost two years, and…you never once liked being called Isabella…you preferred Bella." He spouted out randomly and I looked at him a little shocked at first then let the emotion pass over my face and it was gone.

"Well, people's tastes change…" I said cutting him off and looked down at Bella.

"You never answered me Damion, did I really only know you for less than a week?" she asked.

I looked down at her and I sighed. I couldn't lie to her, so I nodded and looked away. "That's it!" She declared, and I looked back at her shocked.

"Huh?" I asked shocked looking over at Edward who was just as confused.

"My human life is over, dead, gone, in the dust. I don't care if I only knew you for 43 seconds before I was changed! You are important to me Damion, and nothing will change that, ever." She promised squeezing my hand in hers and I smiled. Edward's lip twitched into a scowl that I knew was directed towards me and I smiled back politely.

"Honestly, Isabella, I did only know you a short few days before your change." I laughed humorlessly. "Beg my pardon for saying this, but, my behavior those few days its rather embarrassing, so I have slightly okay feelings with you not recalling it." I said patting her hand.

She sighed and stood up gracefully. "I think I need to hunt." She said calmly looking about the room. I stood up as well and took her hand, which she hesitantly slid out of mine. 'I am sorry Damion, I think I need to speak to Edward on a more serious note right now.' She said smiling at me. "We'll talk when I get back." She said, then she looked at Edward. "If you wish to accompany me, that is.' She said

Edward seemed as though he couldn't muster the words and only managed a small nod. She smiled and squeezed my hand and preceded to walk out the front door, followed by Edward.

The whole situation put a bad taste in my mouth, I didn't want her going and I knew nothing good was going to come of it. Though I trust her. I sighed as I sat back down on the couch and waited. It seemed I was getting good at that where Isabella was concerned.

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THANK YOU FOR READING.

**REVIEW REVIEW CUZ I SAID TOO  
REVIEW REVIEW CUZ I LOVE YOU**

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	7. Hey Guys!

SOOOOOO, I MIGHT BE COMING BACK.

LET ME KNOW OPINIONS.

AND IF I CAME BACK WOULD MY FANS STILL FOLLOW ME?

NEEDING MOTIVATION.

I'M NOW A PROUD MOTHER OF ONE BEATIFUL GIRL

AND A PROUD AUNTY OF A HANDSOME LITTLE BOY.

I WOULD NEED TO DEDICATE TIME TO WRITING.

ALSO WORKING A MIDNIGHT SHIFT.

I NEED TO KNOW YOU WOULD BE WILLING TO FOLLOW ME AGAIN !

AND WHICH STORIES YOU'D BE MOST EAGER TO SEE NEW CHAPTERS IN.

LET ME KNOW ASAP!

LYNN!


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